He calls me out a few weeks ago to complain that when my gates are open he can't get a clear run down the foot path - OK I said, fair enough.............I'll be more conscientious with closing the gates in future (bloody cry-baby).
Last week, it's pissing (or raining heavily) down with rain and I'd opened the gates in preparation for our departure. Two minutes later the postie is in my driveway peeping his poxy-girly-swat horn. I grab Gracie, who's in the wheel chair, and plough through the cluster of kids (sorry guys) standing in the doorway, over the top of Georgie's feet out to the car..................yes I have unashamedly used the wheel chair angle again!
"What? Mate? WHAT's the problem?
"Your gate's open and it's difficult to get your mail in the letter box!"
"Really? It's pissing down with rain and you call me out to tell me that? Clearly I am going out and have opened the gate to facilitate my exit - how else do you suggest I get out of my drive way? Fly over the gate perhaps?"
"Well it's illegal, I should be able to drive down your footpath without obstruction".
OH PLEASE!!! "Hey, here's an idea, how about you push the gate out of your way? I KNOW you can do that, you did that to me the other day as I was reversing out of the driveway and I nearly ran into it!"
"I've had a gut-full of you (articulate aren't I?) this is harassment, your an idiot and I'm putting in a formal complaint"
So, with the kids waiting in the car I spent 30mins lodging my complaint with Australia Post who assured me someone would get back to me within 24 hours - oh, sure, it's been a week and nothing!
And as I watched him drive off down the foot path, there was a little part of me that hoped he would fall off his bike - just a tiny bit!
You know what? I think he likes me!